Earlier this year I started to share my India journal. I got to a point where I needed to stop and pray about what I would share next. I had to decide how open I was willing to be. This post has been written more than once and I think I'm finally ready to share. I have left a few things out.
February 17, 2008
Last night I was under spiritual attack. I went into a deep sleep and started to see faces coming at me. I had to force myself to wake up. I heard snorting noises at the end of the bed and the faces kept coming at me. I tried to call out to Rene but nothing came out. I tried to reach out to him and it felt like there was a wall between us. I was so scared Lord. Psalm 91 came to me and I called out for you. And you were there. I commanded in your name for the spirits to leave. My voice was quiet. I said it again and this time I was able to speak. I said it once again and they left.
I led the morning devotion this today and shared what had happened. I was not the only one attacked last night. I prayed for the armor of God to protect us as we seperated into three groups and headed out to different churches.
I was told before we left that they are seperating the married couples and I don't agree with the decision. I feel like this decision does not honor marriages. I'm not going to fight it, but I do not agree with it.
When our group got to the church we were a little disapointed because there were not a lot of people there. We sat and waited and they started to show up. Mike and I gave our testimonies, Christopher gave a message, and Bridget closed in prayer. Rene and Larry led worship.
We took a bus out to an elderly home. Another team pulled up behind us and we could tell something was wrong.
We went into the home and prayed for the elders. Keith and Scott gave encouraging messages. Suresh had a few of the elderly people share their stories. There was one little girl there that was adorable. I will never forget her face.
A few of the guys went and hung out with some kids there and taught them the banana song.
We were escorted into a banana tree jungle where they had set up tables for us. Banana leaves were laid on top of the table. We were served dinner on them. I could of never imagined that I would be in India, walking through a jungle, and eating dinner in the jungle on banana leaves!!!!
I know something happened with the other group but they are not sharing it with the rest of the team and I'm struggling with it.
Why do I struggle? I love India so much but will I want to come back? I feel like I am being broken down. This trip has been such a roller coaster ride for me Lord and I don't know what the next turn is. I know after today that the rest of this trip will not be the same. Get me through this God. I miss Rene. Please make me strong.
You did answer one prayer for me Lord. I was wondering why you had me pray for love for John and not healing and now I know. Harvest India sent a doctor to John. They think they need to amputate his leg but he will be able to move again.
The doctor can't amputate his leg and the gangreen has spread to his stomach. The doctors can't heal him but he is at peace.